The Horse Husband

In Stories

Martyn HathawayHi! Guess I should introduce myself, I’m the long suffering partner of Sam Lofthouse. I’m one of those that lose their other halves for the majority of the day, every day, I’m the Horse Husband. Also known (affectionately…apparently) as the human tack rack, automatic mounting block, pony payment system, IT support and much more!

I started dating the lovely Samantha Lofthouse in January 2013. Now, although clearly we got on, I feel I was rather conned in our first few months together….her hair was always straightened, she smelled nice every time we met and believe it or not, she was on time (mostly)! As you may have guessed…things are a little different now. Everyone knows that over time relationships change as you get comfortable together…I feel the change in this case has been a little more dramatic!

The perfectly straight hair has slowly morphed into a tangle kept in place by an amazing amount of shavings! The standard perfume is now Eau de Stable and there is so much hay stored in her pockets, boots and everywhere else I can only assume she is actually a scarecrow slowly falling apart! To be fair, Sam is always on time….unfortunately it’s according to her own time, which to me, is generally 30 minutes later than expected!

Now back in the day, pre-equine infestation, I knew what a horse was, which end might bite and which end kicked…should I ever encounter such a beast around town. I now understand the saying “ignorance is bliss”! Sadly those days are long gone, I am now well aware of the time and money they take!!

Most people might think horsey girls are high-maintenance, they’re not. Sam is more than happy to crack on and get things done on her own without thinking of getting help…even when she needs it! This took a bit of getting used to but as soon as I realised by accepting the horses come first…offer help every now and then to show willing, go to some competitions…I could have the quiet life (which is very useful now the football is on). If anyone out there has just started dating a horsey girl, just accept they’ll come first and you’ll be fine. For all the Horse Husbands out there….go find a support group, may I suggest looking in the local pub!


Originally posted to The Horse Husband

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