Everyone has heard of the work/life balance. It’s important to get the right amount of time away from work so that you can live your life. In the horsey world however there is another weight to add to the equation…you guessed it, the ponies. Those half tonne monsters that have a tendency to tip the scale in their favour, every day!
The beginning of any relationship with a horsey person is challenging at best. It is hard to find the time to spend together and even more difficult to accept that they have others in their lives that will always take precedence. But the sooner you come to terms with that the easier your life will be, they don’t just come before you, they come before everything, including your partner! This being said, I have found that, with time, you can find a balance that will work.
The first method to increase the amount of time together is the obvious, go to the source of the problem. Yup…if you expect to be spending hours a day with your partner you’ll have to bite the bullet and go to the horses with them. It is a sure fire way to spend a LONG time together! Soon you’ll realise it’s ok not to be together all the time, you both need time doing your own things. Besides isn’t there a football match on or computer game that needs finishing?!
I do go and help out at the yard (not everyday mind you…I’ve not gone full horse mad!) and since starting this blog I seem to be there more and more. It’s not too bad getting out the house, some “fresh” air and exercise is good for you! I have not however, ever thought it would be a good idea to get on one of the 4 legged beasts. This has led to taking up a new hobby of my own. Photography. Both with her riding and for Lofthouse Equestrian, Sam always wants new photos so I figured I’d give it a go! It’s a great way of being there at the horses…but not actually dealing with the unruly animals. The only problem is, Sam is very picky. I have learned more about how a horse is meant to look from Sam evaluating photos than from actually watching them! ‘His feet aren’t in a V’, ‘His ears are back’, ‘There’s a fly near his face’! There is always the odd one that passes inspection though. So even if you don’t get involved in the day to day of the horses, you can always pick up another hobby to fill the time and be involved!
So, I guess it’s time to talk about the most difficult way to spend more time together. I have only discovered this since Sam moved in and I’m still struggling with it. Simply put…add more hours to the day! I know! I too liked the feeling of waking up whenever I wanted at the weekend, rolling over and staying in bed for another few hours, but no more. Sadly this, like last nights dream, is a hazy memory soon forgotten. You may have guessed, this is not my preferred option to spend more time together. When I’m up first I’m like a ninja…a drunk, slightly concussed ninja but I do my best! Sam on the other hand seems to be trying to get in the mind-set of the horses she’s about to ride and certainly manages to make the same amount of noise. I feel this may not be accidental, rather a not-so-subtle hint to get my arse out of bed!
If you have an equestrian partner and have made it to through the initial confusion of having a horse join you in the relationship, you’ll have probably realised that horses are just part of your lifestyle, if you can get involved to a degree it’s not that bad! If the yard isn’t for you, you’ll get plenty of time to find a hobby of your own!
I feel my time outside of the horsey world is growing short. With Sam starting Lofthouse Equestrian, the work/life/horse is turning into horse/life/horse balance, and with our wedding in January sealing my fate and making me an official Horse Husband, I must accept that there are going to many early mornings at the yard, aching arms from holding saddles and hay…everywhere!
originally published to horse-husband.com